Forever in our hearts

This past couple of weeks has been very hard for my family and I. We got word on Sunday November 13th that my cousin, SFC Jonathan B. McCain, had been killed in Afghanistan from an IED. This has been one of the hardest things we have ever gone thru. He was an outstanding soldier as well as father, husband, son and friend. He loved what he did and lived to fight for his country. A couple of days after it happened I went to see my aunt and uncle and I can honestly say that was extremely difficult. I think I cried the whole time, I went over there saying to myself ," Be strong for them, don't let them see you cry." Well I failed at that to say the least. Just hearing my uncle talk and reminisce about him brought instant tears to my eyes. Especially when he would start to cry, it was like someone was shoving a knife right in the middle of my chest. I just wish I could be with them 24/7, I know they know I'm there if they need anything, but it's just so hard. I think about them constantly and I think about Bryan constantly. It totally consumes my mind. His funeral is in Arlington on December 15th, almost a month later, which makes it more difficult for my family because this whole has been strung out for so long. Its the Army though and you just have to respect they way they do things. They have been most helpful to my aunt and uncle and Bryan's family as well, which I am ever so grateful for. You never think anything like this can happen to you or to your family. It just puts everything into perspective and makes you really take a look at your life and appreciate everything you have. We miss you so much Bryan, I know your in a better place, it's just hard to accept. We love you, you will forever be in our hearts.  

Reminiscing

Over the weekend I received a text message from my cousin that made me stop in my tracks and laugh hysterically. Here's the story..

When we were younger we would all go(and when I say ALL I mean my entire family, aunts, uncles,cousins and grandparents) up to a cabin in Pinetop, I believe it was, and spend the weekend or whatever hanging out and enjoying the weather. Well one night, our mom's went for a walk around the golf course that's right there by the cabin. Ashley and I thought it was a good idea to jump on the bike's and ride around to see if we could find them. HORRIBLE DECISION.! We get to the golf coure and all the sprinklers were on so it was getting part of the pavement wet, well I dont know what happened but all of a sudden Ashley is riding in front of me and she falls off her bike.....I can see her just sitting there and I'm peddling full speed ahead....and BAM I run right into her and my tire smacks her in the face. Needless to say we were both laughing hysterically. After a minute of trying to recoup we get back on our bikes and continue our ride around the golf course, now from what I remember, we ended up on the other side almost in a "neighborhood" with a bunch of cabins backing up to the golf course. It's been forever, so I'm not totally clear on all the details. Anyways, we were riding in this "neighborhood" and all of a sudden this dog comes out of nowhere charging at us. I started screaming and peddling as fast as I could leaving Ashley in the dust. She's yelling for me to stop and, I of course, can't her over my screaming and crying. This dog would not give up....I even lost a flip flop.!What seemed like hours, was really only a couple minutes, the dog finally backed off and the owner comes out yelling, "The dog won't hurt you." UH HELLO....your dog just chased me down the street ready to tear my head off.! Keep in mind I was only probably like 11 or 12 maybe. So Ashley comes riding up next me to laughing. I DID NOT find it funny at that particular moment, but now every time I think about it or we bring it up I start laughing uncontrollably. Needless to say, she was up in Pinetop over the weekend and they were walking around that same golf course that we had our little "dog encounter" with.

Enough is Enough

So last week I decided that I NEEDED to do something about my "weight problem". I have been so depressed and feeling so gross lately, especially when we have family get together's and I'm around all my "skinny" family members, it just makes me feel even more self-conscious. So I decided ENOUGH IS ENOUGH, I'm going to do something about it.

After I had Reece I had actually lost more than what I was before I was pregnant...YAY, GO ME.! And then low and behold after I stopped breast feeding I gained like 20 lbs...(this is really hard for me to share) and it's been a constant struggle ever since. The problem is, I LOVE sweets.! I think I have the biggest sweet tooth on the planet. I wish I was one of those people that don't mind either way whether or not they have them, but I'm not. So I started a diet last week....and I like to call it more of a lifestyle change because we all know diets don't last and then you just end up right back where you were. Since last Thursday I have lost 8 LBS.!!! I was so proud of myself.! Although, I don't look like I've lost 8 lbs and I'm not noticing my clothes feeling any different, I just have to be patient. I'm the kind of person who wants results NOW. I hate waiting.!I think I'm the MOST impatient person ever,so sticking to this has been a little bit of a challenge, but every time I see the scale drop, I just tell myself that it's worth it. I am now going on day 7 of NO JUNK and NO SWEETS,I can't believe it myself.! It's not as hard as it seems and I'm really glad I decided to finally get my S#%& in gear.

Fall is here...where has the time gone

Oh my goodness.!! I am HORRIBLE with blogging, I haven't blogged since last October.! I seriously need to get my stuff in gear and make this part of my weekly routine. I'm promising myself that I will be more involved with my blogging.


Now where do I even begin.?! It's been so long and so many things have happened I don't even know where to start. Matt is still on the border mission, going on over a year now. I have had a test with Gilbert PD and Mesa PD to become a 911 operator/dispatcher. I'm totally nervous, they are time consuming tests with a lot of information packed into one. I'm not going to get my hopes up though, we'll see what happens. We moved in September out to Queen Creek and we absolutely LOVE it. We finally have a house, that we're renting, and couldn't be more ecstatic with all the space and the peace and quiet. It sure is a huge difference than an apartment. We vowed to never live in an apartment again. YUCK.!! We eventually would like to move back to Ohio where Matt's family is. I love it back there and can't help but want to move back. I of course would miss my family, but we have been through a lot this past year(very few people know, even those closest to us) and fresh start is just calling our name. I feel like it's time to venture out and see the world( HA I'm talking like I'm traveling the world or something) but you know what I mean. Reece is doing FANTASTIC.!! He is such a joy to our lives. We don't know what we would do without him. He has the BEST personality and he's so funny. Still not walking, but that's okay, he will when he's ready. He pulls himself up and walks around things, and let me tell you, when he doesn't get something he wants, he finds a way.!We went to Cali over the summer for my cousins wedding and it was his first time at the beach. He LOVED it, arms and legs flailing all over the place. It was so funny and filled my heart with pure joy. Matt unfortunately missed that trip tho.

We celebrated Reece's 1st Birthday.! Can you believe he's already 1.?! I can't, I almost cried. I'm telling you this year has gone by way too fast.! It was a fun day though, we celebrated it with close family and friends. We had a party at the house, all decked out in 'CARS' he loves cars.

Halloween came just as fast as it went. Reece was a tiger, the cutest tiger I've ever seen might I add, and he LOVED every minute of it. We sat outside and passed out candy and he had fun dumping the bowls out. Every time a kid would come up Reece would go silent and stare in awe. It was pretty funny. Matt missed out on the fun though, I felt really bad for him, he misses a lot of "milestones" and things in Reece's life. Granted he's home a lot, but he's also away a lot too. He won't be here for Thanksgiving or Christmas we don't think, so I'm having a really hard with deciding if I should even celebrate the two. I'm thinking of doing our own thing when he's home. I hate that he misses out and it wouldn't be fair if we celebrated without him. It's something I need to ponder, I still have a ways. I know there are things I'm missing and leaving out, but I haven't blogged in so long there's no way I could fit every nook and cranny in, but I promise to blog regularly. 

Happy Fall everyone....stay warm.!